The Love of a Good Man
by Colt And Katana
Summary: When Beth realizes Rick Grimes has fallen for her she is surprised and more than a little put off at the idea. She leaves him heartbroken when she rejects him but over time she begins to warm to the idea of a romance with the group leader.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N**: Written for a friend who liked the idea of Rick being rejected by Beth.

**...**

**_If someone were to ask Rick Grimes_** where his feelings for the young Beth Greene came from, he honestly wouldn't be able to answer. If someone were to ask him to rationalize the flutter in he felt in his chest upon seeing her he wouldn't be able to. If someone were to ask him to explain how he could have her in mind right now, as he lay in his bunk, beating off to thoughts of her being under him, with him inside of her, he wouldn't have words to begin to offer a single argument to justify his actions. He was as mystified by what was happening as anyone would be if they knew.

Thankfully no one knew. No one had a clue, especially her, and he intended to keep it that way.

Once he came, once he cleaned up, he couldn't stop the feelings of guilt and shame that overcame him. He wiped sweat from his brow, licked his dry lips, and turned to face the wall of his cell.

_Christ_, he thought. _I'm beating off to thoughts of a seventeen-year-old girl. A teenager. What the fuck is wrong with me?_

Lori would be ashamed. She'd be disturbed and ashamed and he felt tears of self-loathing sting his eyes. Had he known any other man in the world, even the fucked up world they now lived in where things like age differences no longer mattered, was hot for a seventeen-year-old girl he would put them out of his group. It was sick. It was wrong.

And he was completely powerless to stop it.

He suspected his son Carl had once nursed a crush on Beth. He'd never thought it had been mutual, though. There was a world of difference between a girl only a month shy of her eighteenth birthday and a boy six months shy of his fourteenth. Girls matured faster.

That's what he kept telling himself, anyway.

It was quiet nights like this that Rick tried to analyze what he felt. He thought maybe losing Lori had broken more than just his mind, but his moral center, too. Perhaps seeing Beth care for Judith as though the baby was her own, made him feel something for her. Perhaps he was confusing gratitude and admiration for something that it wasn't, and his own perfectly normal need for sex, combined with gratitude and admiration, had him thinking he was in love with her.

Which was ridiculous in his own ears.

_I'm a thirty-six year-old man who is most definitely not in love with a seventeen-year-old girl_, he told himself. He didn't believe it but he took comfort in the lie.

After wrestling with is guilt, Rick shut his eyes and finally drifted off to sleep.

…

**_Beth Greene loved a good sunny day_**. She also loved a good rainy day. She especially enjoyed rain at night, when it provided background noise to sleep by. She once had not been able to sleep without the sound of a fan in the room. That had been the hardest part of adjusting to a world without electricity: no noise to sleep by.

She awoke to the sound of a heavy rain and stretched, smiling, thinking that today was going to be a good day. They needed the rain for the crops and for water. It still had to be boiled, of course, but they would use it for everything from bathing to washing clothes and dishes, and sterilizing bandages.

Today she quickly showered and dressed and headed out to grab some breakfast. She had a big day ahead of her. She was going on a run. Her father and sister had bucked the idea but she was enthusiastic. She was going to finally prove she wasn't just a good shot but that she was useful for more than babysitting Judith.

Not that she minded Judith. She loved the little angel, her adopted daughter, but she wanted more from life than mothering a dead woman's child. She wanted to do something new, different, something exciting that would contribute to the group.

Rick met her in the common room where Michonne was doling out scrambled eggs. She sprinkled pepper, they were out of salt, on her eggs and hurried to eat.

"Why such a hurry?" Rick asked.

"We have to get going, right?"

He smiled at her and covered her hand with his in a friendly pat.

"Don't choke."

When breakfast was over Beth met up with her father and sister by the door. She saw the looks of worry in their faces and felt a stab of pity, but it was overwhelmed by an even deeper stab of annoyance.

"I'm gonna be with Rick, I'll be fine."

"I know," Hershel said, smiling. "Just be sure to listen to everything he says."

"I will."

"You sure you don't want me to come with you?" asked Maggie.

"I definitely don't want you coming along," Beth replied. "I'll see you when I get back. Anything you want me to keep an eye out for?"

Maggie leaned in to hug Beth and whispered, "Condoms."

She giggled and kissed her father goodbye before heading off to the truck with Rick. They were taking the Tucson and he made sure the tank was at least half full before they started off. Beth lamented that the rain had gone but she figured it would be safer not to go out in a storm.

…

"_**Are you scared?"**_

"A little," Beth answered honestly.

"Good. You haven't forgotten that out here, fear can keep you alive."

Beth nodded agreeably. "I just, don't take this the wrong way, but I just want to do more for our people than babysit. I love Judy!"

Rick was smiling. "I know. She loves you too. You're the only mother she's ever really known."

"I've always wanted kids."

"You'll have them, someday."

Beth felt like that was a dream, really. One that would never come true. Still, it didn't stop her from hoping for it.

They went through familiar streets and beyond, into territory she hadn't seen since their winter on the run after the farm, and she it hit her just how blessed they were to have the prison. It's gates and its fences, the walls, everything down to the cells was added security that she'd always be grateful for.

Eventually they found a few houses that looked like they may not have been raided and climbed out of the truck. It was quiet out, no signs of walkers. Rick led the way into the house and Beth followed, her knife at the ready, her heart in her throat. Rick knocked on the door and they waited.

"Okay, we've got one, maybe more, inside," he said, hearing shuffling and the raspy breath of a walker inside. He shoved the door open, knocking a woman that looked like she'd been the missus of the house, onto her back. Rick moved quickly, driving his knife into her skull, ending her. Another walker shuffled forward and Beth gasped.

It was a child. A little boy of about ten.

"I got it," Rick said.

God, he hated killing children. Even though its teeth were as much of a threat as any walkers he still hated it. As soon as the boy was down he dragged it by its feet to lie next to its mother. Beth had moved to grab a blanket off the couch. She threw it over the bodies, feeling heavy and saddened.

Rick's hand was comforting on her shoulder. He squeezed and when she looked into his eyes she saw something there that she couldn't put a finger on. It was an intense look and she wondered what it was. Then Rick's hand slid down her back and pulled her a little closer.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly.

Beth instinctively stepped back, feeling a little uncomfortable with Rick's touch at the small of her back. There was an intimacy to it that didn't feel merely platonic. It had something to do with the way his fingers curled into her skin, one finger slipping below the waist of her jeans. Something was strange about the way he looked at her but she wasn't sure why. It was Rick, after all.

He swallowed and quickly removed his hand. They stood there, in awkward silence, until Beth said, "Well, we should clear the rest of the house, I guess."

Rick nodded and started off, his back straight and stiff, an odd look on her face that she couldn't define. He looked angry but for the life of her she couldn't figure out why.

_What just happened?_ Beth wondered. She trailed along after him, clearing the house. There were no other walkers inside and they set to work searching for useful things.

…

_**Rick cursed himself**_.

_What the fuck did you just do?_

He wondered what on earth had possessed him to pull Beth toward him. He'd meant to comfort her, not scare her, or repulse her. He put himself in her shoes: She was a seventeen year-old-girl on a run, alone, with an older man whom she trusted but had suddenly gotten perverse with her. He'd touched her like a lover, the way he used to touch Lori, because he'd missed touching a woman in that way. He missed female flesh.

_She's not a woman, she's a girl_, he reminded himself.

She was probably afraid of him. He stewed in self loathing and anger as he yanked open one drawer after another, blindly going through items, picking out the good stuff by rote without having to put too much thought into it, until his bag was full.

"Rick? Have I done something?"

He realized Beth was watching him and he looked up at her. "No, why?"

She shrugged. "You look mad."

"No, I'm not mad. Especially not at you." He tried to smile to reassure her. She smiled back but didn't look completely convinced. "You're doing great on this run. Still scared?"

She shrugged. "Not scared, no. Cautious, I guess."

He nodded. "Good."

"Bingo," she said a few moments later, when she was in the bathroom of the master bedroom.

"Found something good?"

"Yeah, condoms—" She suddenly gasped, looking horrified, and Rick stiffened.

"Okay."

"Maggie wants them," she hastened to explain. She had an unopened box of twelve in her hand. She looked tiny and embarrassed as she stuffed them into her bag. "So, another house?"

"Yeah," he agreed, allowing her to lead the way out.

It was tense from that moment forward. Rick kept seeing himself slip one of the condoms on before slipping into Beth and he hated himself. He wondered what Beth was thinking as they cleared another house and scrounged up useful items, including diapers and baby formula for Judith. He wished, that of all the people they were bringing into the prison, a nursing mother would be among them, but no such luck. He was constantly worried about running out of food for her.

"I think this is enough," he said, after clearing a fourth house. The truck was stacked and it was getting dark.

"This was an easy run," she said. "Only two walkers. It's exciting."

He grinned as he climbed into the truck. Her bag had the condoms in it. She was now touching his arm and smiling at him, talking about being excited with fucking rubbers in her bag.

"Thanks for bringing me."

"No problem. If you want to come along on more runs let me know. I'll be happy to bring you along."

"Really?"

He couldn't help but enjoy her bright smile. "Really."

A few raindrops pattered on the windshield and, feeling like a perverse freak, Rick started back for the prison with a stirring in his loins. He had a feeling he'd be lotioning up his hand again tonight with images of Beth Greene's legs wrapped around his waist playing through his mind.

…

_**Beth grabbed her journal and sat**_ down on her bed to write.

_I went on a run last week with Rick. It was just__  
><em>_the two of us. Something happened. I can't really__  
><em>_say what but it was weird. He touched me in a way__  
><em>_that he'd never touched me before. Not that he __  
><em>_touches me a lot anyway. It just had this strange feel__  
><em>_to it. It was intimate and it felt sexual. I was __  
><em>_really uncomfortable because I didn't know how to__  
><em>_read him. I've never had an experience like that __  
><em>_before. If it was Carl I'd have thought he was flirting__  
><em>_with me, or was going to kiss me, but this is RICK!__  
><em>_He wouldn't do something like that, would he? Not__  
><em>_with me. If he was flirting or if he's into me like that__  
><em>_I don't know how I feel about it. I've started to notice__  
><em>_things since then. I've started to notice he looks at me__  
><em>_a lot. He stands too close and he touches me every__  
><em>_chance he gets. I'm probably wrong about this but I__  
><em>_swear, I think he's got a crush on me. I can't say anything.__  
><em>_Imagine how stupid I'd look asking a thirty-six year old__  
><em>_man if he's hot for me. He'd be so offended if it isn't__  
><em>_true. But what if he said yes, that he wants me like__  
><em>_that__? What would I do then? God, if Daddy and __  
><em>_Maggie found out they'd do something awful. It would __  
><em>_ruin everything here. He'd lose everyone's respect. What__  
><em>_do I do?_

She put her pen down and tucked her diary away just as the man himself arrived at her cell, carrying Judith. The baby was asleep when she took him from Rick's arms.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, why?"

He shrugged. "I've been watching you. You seem down."

"You watch me a lot, don't you?" she asked quietly.

Rick looked down and shoved his hands in his pockets. A moment later he looked into her eyes and opened his mouth to speak but thought better of it.

"I'll pick her up tonight around six."

Beth nodded and watched him go. She cradled his daughter in her arms and wondered what was going on with him. What had he been about to say? It was times like this that Beth wished she had more life experience, more experience with men, so she'd have some clue as to what was going on with Rick. She couldn't figure him out.

She knew someone who could, though. She put Judith in the little stroller they'd picked up that week and wheeled her down to the court where the tubs had been set up for laundry day. She found her sister Maggie scrubbing clothes on a washboard and she took a seat on one of the steps near her.

"Maggie? How do you know if a man is interested in you?"

"I wouldn't call Carl a man. I don't think he's still got that crush on you anyway."

Maggie looked at Beth and mistook her silence for hurt. "Don't let it bother you. Boys his age are fickle. Besides, he's too young for you anyway, right?"

"I wasn't talking about Carl. This is an older man."

"Who?"

"I'm not ready to say."

Maggie was looking at her fully now. "Beth, we've been taking strangers in. We don't know them or what they may try. If somebody's bothering you—"

"No, Maggie. It's fine. Never mind."

"You sure?"

Beth nodded and took Judith for a walk. She spotted Rick and Daryl talking by the gate. They were laughing, which was rare for both men. As though he could sense her gaze, Rick looked back at her. She pretended not to see him and continued on. She happened upon Michonne and hurried her way. Michonne would talk to her without trying to be overprotective.

"Michonne?"

Michonne was lifting weights when Beth approached. "What's up?"

"I need your advice."

"Okay."

"How do I know if a man is interested in me? An older man."

Michonne put the weights down and began to stretch her muscles.

"If you have to ask, chances are you know the answer."

Beth considered that for a moment.

"Talk to him. You can't guess what people are thinking. Not really. If you're wrong it's fine. If you're right you can go from there."

Beth relaxed. Michonne was right. It wasn't fair for her to make assumptions, not to her or him.

"If you find out this older man is interested, do you think you'd feel the same?"

"I don't know," Beth said honestly.

"Take your time. Do what feels right for you."

Michonne resumed her workout and Beth thanked her before taking Judy inside, out of the heat, for a feeding."

**…**

_**She knows**_**, ****_Rick thought_****.**

He watched Beth stroll Judith toward Michonne, who was working out.

"Why you always watching that girl?"

_Fuck_…

He should have known to be careful around other people, especially Daryl Dixon, but he often found himself gazing at Beth without being aware he was doing it at first. Then, when he was aware, he couldn't stop.

"I don't," he tried to cage.

Daryl wasn't buying it. "She's seventeen, man."

"I know how old she is."

Daryl shrugged but Rick could tell he was a little stiff in the back as he did it. He felt a wave of shame and also a need to open up to someone about it. Daryl was his best friend. He was a man of few words and he was also understanding.

"I'd never act on it."

That was all he needed to say to finally give voice to the hell he'd been going through the past few months. He felt as though weight had literally been lifted from his body. His chest and stomach didn't feel as heavy, though he did feel shame.

"She know?" Daryl asked, crossing his arms.

Rick looked back at Beth, who was carrying the stroller with Judith in it up the steps and into the prison.

"I don't know. I think she has an idea."

He looked back into Daryl's sky blue eyes. He was relieved to see there wasn't anger or disappointment, just curiosity.

"Why her?"

"I can't explain it," Rick answered honestly. "Damned if I can explain it. It's not about sex, Daryl. Not just about that. Beth and I have nothing in common. I'm twice her age and…I just can't explain it but it's real. I can't stop it."

"You're in love with her then?" Daryl asked, looking like a curious and confused puppy.

"I don't know," were the words to come out of Rick's mouth but something in his gut was screaming _yes_.

"Be careful," Daryl advised. "Everybody here looks to you for everything, even if you don't give the orders anymore. They may not trust you if they found out you were hot for a teenaged girl."

"You too?"

"Naw, man. I trust you."

He patted Rick on the arm and headed to his bike where he knelt and began the process of an oil change. Rick started back for the prison. He had a lot of work to do. Maybe, if Daryl was still his friend, still trusted him, he wasn't the monster he felt he was whenever he dreamed of holding Beth close and kissing her, or lying next to her as she slept.


	2. Chapter 2

**_Beth paced the tiny space of_** her cell as she waited for Rick to pick Judith up. She was nervous about taking Michonne's advice and talking to Rick but at the same time she knew it was something that couldn't be avoided. She'd long since learned problems, or any issue, didn't simply disappear because you ignored them. In fact, ignoring them often made things worse.

He arrived promptly at six pm and headed for the crib but Beth halted him with a hand to his arm.

"Can we talk?"

She felt sorry for Rick because he looked nervous. He nodded and sat down on her bunk.

"Something happened between us on the run. You touched me and you had this look in your eyes…and I've noticed you looking at me a lot and you stand close and…Rick, do you like me? Romantically, I mean? If I'm wrong I'm so sorry. I just thought maybe you were into me and…"

He was silent, watching the wall opposite. She'd hoped he would immediately deny it but the fact that he wasn't was all the answer she needed.

"You're not wrong."

Beth fought the urge to stand up. All she could do was sit there and stare at his profile. She didn't know what to think, or feel, other than a vague sense of disappointment in him. He wasn't exactly a father figure. He was more like an uncle. She'd assumed he saw her as more of a niece or a little sister. Never as a woman he'd desire.

She saw a look of pain ghost across his face as he read her feelings, which were so plainly visible in her big blue eyes. She was turned off, disgusted, as she should be, he imagined.

"I don't see myself as a woman yet. I can't imagine you do," she said, deciding honesty would be best for them both. He only nodded in silence.

"I'm sorry, Rick. I just…I'm not into you like that. You're like a big brother or an uncle—"

He laughed and it sounded bitter.

"I'm sorry! I don't want to hurt you. I'm just…you're too old for me. I'm not comfortable with the idea of us being anything more than friends."

"Understood," he replied, and took Judith from the cradle. Now that he stood in the light she could see his face was red. He was humiliated, she was sure of it. Anyone would be after being rejected.

"I'm sorry," she repeated, unsure what else to say.

"Beth, you have nothing to be sorry for."

"I'll pick Judy up in the morning."

He nodded and left, walking briskly down the hall until he was out of sight.

…

**_Hershel Greene was a man with a lot of time on his hands_**.

Losing his leg from the knee down had really put a damper on his mobility, and he was still hoping to locate a prosthetic so he wouldn't have to hobble around on crutches. He'd be able to help Rick out in the gardens more. He'd be able to help with harder chores and feel like a more useful member of the community. His daughters, indeed everyone, wanted him to take it easy, telling him he'd more than earned a leisurely retirement, but the truth was leisurely was boring.

To combat feelings of uselessness he did what he could. He considered himself to be a fairly decent judge of character. With new people coming in every week he spent time watching them, listening to them talk. He knew a good person when he met one, given enough time to observe them, and he knew a rotten apple when he saw one too. He'd made a couple of judgment calls that had spared them the hassle of dealing with some unscrupulous men and women that the council had wisely kicked to the curb before too much damage could be done.

Newcomers weren't the only people he watched. Just out of habit, he supposed, he found himself watching his people. They always filled him with pride, even when they were bickering and struggling to make it work. In fact, watching those turbulent moments was his favorite, because he got to see them pull together, always together, rather than apart.

It was during these moments that he began to pick up on something rather surprising. That would be Rick Grimes' apparent interest in his youngest girl, Beth. He wasn't exactly sure what he was seeing but his gut told him it was a matter of the heart. He could have been angry or upset. Perhaps he would have been had such a thing happened before the Turn but now things were different. Life was different, and attitudes had to change. He wasn't above evolving. He wasn't above accepting things he may not have accepted in his life before mankind hit this incredible bump in the road, as long as those changes didn't lead to serious injury or heartbreak.

Hershel felt little surprise at seeing the way Rick was with Beth. She'd filled Lori's shoes in so many ways with Judith. She was, for all intents and purposes, the baby's mother. He supposed it was natural that, having lost his wife and for awhile his sanity, Rick would suffer some confusion about what he felt for the young lady who took such care for his baby.

There was even less surprise when Beth came to him that evening and asked to talk with him about something important. Maggie had already informed him that Beth thought an older man was interested in her. Now Beth wanted to talk to him and he was more than willing to give her his advice. They took a seat by the grill and enjoyed the warm, balmy evening. A breeze had picked up, making the air stir up scents of kudzu and honeysuckle.

"Tell me about you and Mama," Beth said.

"What would you like to know?"

"I just like the story of how you fell in love."

Hershel nodded. His and Josephine's story wasn't terribly different than her story with Rick, should there ever be a story there.

"Well, I'd been long-time friends with Jo's father. He was a Baptist preacher and a good man. She developed a crush on me when she was sixteen but I wouldn't have anything to do with her. She was a kid in my eyes. She pursued me, though. After about a year my head started to turn."

Beth smiled as she listened, thinking about the mother she couldn't remember very well.

"Her father gave us his blessing but said we'd have to wait until she was eighteen to court. So we did. Jo was an impatient woman. She insisted we get married straight away, said she knew I was the man for her, and I knew she was the woman for me. So, a week after her eighteenth birthday we married. Two years later we had Maggie. Six years after that, we had you."

"Her father wasn't angry that you were so much older?"

Hershel nodded. "He wasn't happy but he knew I was a good man who would treat his daughter right, and I did."

"But you divorced," she pointed out.

Hershel nodded. "She wanted more from life than to be a housewife. Maggie was angry when I met Annette a year later and married her."

"She was younger than you too," Beth pointed out.

"Yeah. Young ladies love me, what can I say?"

Beth enjoyed a good laugh with her father at that.

"What's this about, Bethie? Maggie tells me an older man is interested in you."

She nodded but didn't elaborate. He didn't push. She'd tell him when she was ready.

"How do you feel about that?"

"I don't know, Daddy. I'm gonna be Mama's age when she married you in just a couple of weeks but…I guess I'm surprised he sees me as a woman. I thought everyone saw me as a little girl."

"Which always upset you."

"Yeah. Now that I know there's someone who doesn't it just…it's jarring. It's weird. I can't wrap my mind around _him_ seeing me that way."

"Rick?" Hershel prodded.

Beth's eyes snapped onto his. "How did you know?"

"I watch people. I saw this coming."

"Please, Daddy, don't be upset. He's going through a lot right now—"

"Oh, Bethie. I'm not upset. How is the best way to put this?"

He looked out at the brightly lit sky. There was a full moon and the whole world glowed with silvery light. He tried to choose his words carefully.

"You can't put a price, or undervalue, the love of a good man, especially in this world. I'm not one to judge Rick considering my background with Jo is pretty much the same as his with you. I understand what he feels. Like Jo, you're very mature. You're much more mature than you realize. You've got a lot of growing up to do but you're not a baby. You're not a little girl and he sees that. I see that. Most people who know you can see it. Honestly, I can't think of a better man to trust with your life and your well being than Rick. Not only would he be good to you, he'd move heaven and earth to keep you safe. If you're worried whether or not I'll be put off or angry if you find that you reciprocate his feelings, don't. I trust you to know your own mind and your own heart, and to make a decision that's right for you. I trust Rick to do the same."

"I just don't know what I want. This came as such a shock to me."

"You don't have to decide that now. You can take all the time you need. If you never feel anything other than friendship for Rick, there's nothing wrong with that. You don't have to fall in love with him if that's not what your heart wants, but if it does, you don't have to fight it."

"Maggie will be angry. So with others."

"Let her. Let them. This is your life, not hers, and certainly not theirs."

"I really thought you'd be upset."

"I'm full of surprises, aren't I?" he said, and kissed her forehead.

"Thanks, Daddy. I feel so much better now."

"Glad I could help. Now you get inside before the bugs eat you alive. I'd like to enjoy some of this fresh air alone."

She kissed him on the cheek and then headed inside.

…

**_She passed Rick as she moved_**deeper into the prison to head to her cell but he either didn't see her or he was ignoring her. Probably the latter. She could make up her mind. She wasn't the little girl she'd taken herself to be. Perhaps it was time to see herself as Rick did, as her father did.

_Take all the time you need_, her father had said, so she decided she'd heed his advice. She wouldn't act on anything just yet. She'd just let the idea simmer in her mind.

Rick Grimes as a potential boyfriend. _Rick_, of all people.

The idea didn't seem so foreign, or repugnant, as she lay down in her bunk and tried to fall asleep. She thought of Rick, of his embarrassment earlier, and felt a stab of guilt. She was sorry for that, but she didn't regret not jumping into anything with him that she wasn't ready for, or may never want.

The love of a good man couldn't be undervalued. Rick, Beth thought, was definitely a good man. He was, possibly, the best man she knew besides her father.

…

**_The walkers at the fences were becoming a real threat_**.

Beth took fence duty one day with Maggie, using a sharpened cane to kill them, but it seemed as soon as she killed one, two more popped up to take its place. A ruckus at the gate drew Beth's attention. Rick and Michonne were arguing about something but she couldn't hear what.

"So, what do you want for your birthday?"

That came from Glenn, who stood on Beth's left.

"Oh…I haven't thought about it. I want cake and ice cream."

He smiled. "Well, cake and ice cream are in really short supply nowadays. Anything else?"

"A beef steak, then," she said, bringing an even bigger smile to his face.

"Yeah, we're really low on cows, too."

"In that case, stale chocolate."

"That I might be able to do."

"What's going on over there?"

Beth motioned at the gate, where Rick was now working with Carl to open it. Michonne didn't drive through. Instead she stepped out with her sword drawn and began to kill walkers there. She eventually made her way further left, working her way toward them.

"Is she crazy?" Maggie asked. "Make noise!"

They began trying to get the walkers' attention, calling to them, keeping them distracted while Michonne snuck up on them. It only worked for so long. Once they realized a living person, potential food, was outside the gates they began to turn that way. In just a few moments Michonne was forced to retreat. Rick and Carl began to work to pull the gate shut.

"She's been really frustrated with the fence thing lately," Glenn said. "When she's here."

There was a hint of resentment to Glenn's tone. It was no secret that he, and a few others, didn't like one of their best friends, and fighters, leaving to hunt for the Governor. They took people in who'd survived mainly by luck or with other groups. They were weaker without her.

"She took out nine of them. That helps a lot," said Maggie.

"Daryl's back," Beth told them. He came in this morning with a new guy."

"There he is," said Glenn.

Daryl was doing an 'intake' with their newest member. He was a cocky guy who'd come in driving a black Comaro and he shamelessly flirted. Beth found him somewhat attractive.

"Forget that mystery older man you told me about," said Maggie. "He's cute and closer to your age."

Beth ignored Maggie and went back to their job of killing walkers on the fence.

"Here he comes," Maggie said. She moved off to make room for the newcomer, who took up a space besie Beth.

"There you are, beautiful," he said. Beth smiled and continued with their job of killing walkers on the fence.

"I'm Zach Conyers."

"Beth Greene."

"How long you been here?"

"Since the start. Our group took this place."

He nodded. "You're part of 'the family' that woman Carol was telling me about."

"Yep."

"You got a boyfriend?"

Beth shook her head. He'd been doing so well. Now he'd pushed too hard, too fast.

"No. I'm not looking for one, either."

She moved off, leaving Zach with a perplexed expression.

"I say something?"

Glenn snorted. "Too much, man."

He looked disappointed. When she looked back he mouthed 'sorry' and decided maybe there was hope for him after all.

Then she caught Rick out of the corner of her eye, just in time to see him turn from her and walk away. She'd seen hurt in his eyes and she felt sorry for him.

…

**_For two straight days Beth didn't_**have time to worry about men, older or otherwise. Heavy winds had picked up and knocked trees over the fence at the back of the prison, forcing everyone to hurry up to remove the fallen trees, the debris, and get a temporary wall set up in its place until the fence could be mended. Thankfully some men with construction experience had come in with a few of the groups and they knew how to address the problem.

If Beth wasn't busy with Judith she was helping with construction and manning the grill to cook for everyone. The winds were a real problem but thankfully they didn't have to deal with rain on top of everything else.

When Beth awoke on the third morning she headed to the basketball court where some of the others were going through and sorting out goods from a really big haul. A grocery store that had been overrun with walkers had been cleared out and now they had, it seemed literally, tons of stuff to sort. It took three trucks on three trips to haul everything useful back.

Rick had the spirits, wines, whisky, beer, and other alcoholic beverages, as well as soda, put under lock and key to be dealt out as rewards or consumed on special occasions.

"It would rain now," Maggie complained.

They'd been working for over an hour, just on the sorting alone, and now evening was coming in early because the sky had clouded over, heavily so, and now rain was falling. It was a warm rain, pleasant to the skin, but rain was a hindrance. Beth stacked canned goods and then separated the cans of baby formula and diapers from the rest. She was disappointed there wasn't more considering so many other things were in great supply.

"This is the best haul we've ever had," Glenn said, picking up a carton loaded with cans of whole kernel corn. "Ever," he added happily.

"This will last a couple of months if we slow down bringing new people in," Carol noted.

Beth took the cart she'd loaded with baby supplies and started toward the entrance to C Block when she saw him approaching. Rick was covered in blood, despite the steady rain. It ran down his face in red rivulets and he looked exhausted.

He also looked sexy, Beth was loathe to admit. She probably wouldn't have allowed her mind to wander there had she not known of his attraction to her, and even been given her father's blessing to make her own decisions as to what she wanted to do about it. He was clearly lost in thought, unaware of how good he looked with his clothes sticking to his body.

"Everything okay?"

He was drawn from thought by her question.

"Yeah. A group of walkers attacked the workers on the wall."

"Didn't hear any shots."

"Managed to take them out without firing," he said. "Need help with that?"

She nodded and together they lifted the cart up the steps.

"Is this all they had in baby supplies?" he asked, disappointed.

"Yeah, I know. The formula will last a month. There are some jars of baby food but she's got a few months before she's ready for that. At least I have diapers for her, though."

He smiled and headed inside, and she followed after wishing things could go back to the way they used to be. Ever since she'd rejected him Rick had been very good not to stand too close, to touch her, or even look at her longer than necessary. He insisted he wasn't angry with her. He just didn't want her to feel pressured.

She was sure he was just embarrassed. She'd made him feel old and undesirable, though she didn't see him that way at all. He was just too old for her.

Or was he?

She kept thinking of her parents. Her father had been twenty-two years older than her mother. Rick was eighteen years older than her. While she still couldn't wrap her mind around it, she had to admit that wasn't her only concern. She wondered if perhaps she displayed some interest in him he would think her too young. She wouldn't be enough, she wouldn't be on equal footing, he'd regret getting involved with her.

Or perhaps she would regret being with him if he tried to daddy her. Or perhaps they'd hit it off and she'd have to deal with other people's stares, their disapproval. Especially Maggie and Carol. And how would Carl react if he found out? Maggie hadn't been happy when Annette came along. Beth figured Carl would be even angrier that his father had hooked up with a girl he'd once been interested in, who was only five years older than he was.

She pushed such concerns from her mind as she took the supplies to her cell. She'd be using them the most so she'd keep some there, and give some to Rick, divide it up between them for Judith's care. She was, after all, practically _their_ baby, not just his.


	3. Chapter 3

**_It was time for another run_**. This time Beth was going to go out with Michonne, Daryl, and Zach.

It was a bright and sunny morning when Beth met up with the others at the gate. She'd tried to find Rick, to tell him she was going on the run since she hadn't seen him in a couple of days, but he was in the field and he'd been cold-shouldering her and she didn't think he would care if she stayed or left, so she'd opted not to bother.

"I got these for you," Zach said, offering her a pair of sunglasses.

"Why?"

"Keep the sun out of your eyes. They can come in handy on a day like this."

"Thanks," she said, slipping them on. She hadn't realized how bright it was until she slipped them on. "Much better. Thanks."

"No problem."

Daryl slid in beside Zach while Beth hopped in back with Michonne. Her eyes wandered over to the field where Rick was hoeing the soil and talking to her father. They'd be planting corn. She wondered about the topic of conversation, whether or not her father had spoken to Rick about his interest in her. She doubted her father would bring it up. She knew Rick wouldn't.

Unlike her run with Rick this one didn't go nearly as smoothly. They'd only gotten a few items before running across walkers, nothing they couldn't handle with their knives. Michonne dealt with most of the five that came shuffling their way, but one was about to sneak up on Zach so Beth had taken out her knife, ready to deal with it, when Zach stepped in.

"I got it," he said.

Beth felt a little peeved. She could have handled it. She didn't need him playing superman for her. She decided not to say anything and continued on to the next house, which was empty.

"Michonne and I got the second floor. You two search this. Don't go in the basement without us," Daryl said. "Hey," he added, tapping Zach on the shoulder. "I mean it."

"Cool, Boss. No problem."

Beth started rummaging through drawers, looking for batteries and candles. She only found a couple of items when Zach reached out to smooth hair back from her face.

"Looked like it was bothering you."

"It wasn't."

He nodded. "So, there's a dance this Saturday night in the ball court. Wanna go as my date?"

Beth considered it. Dating wasn't something she'd gotten to do a lot of. She and Jimmy had gone on three dates before the world fell apart. After that she hadn't bothered trying to find someone to go with her on the rare date nights held at the prison.

She shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

Zach looked a bit happier than her answer warranted. He was like an open book, so eager to get close to her, and she found it endearing. "Cool. I'll pick you up at seven?"

"Yeah, okay."

They continued rummaging in the kitchen. Beth found a really good can opener and a sharpening stone that she threw into her bag, and a baby rattler on the counter. There were also a few bags of unopened pinto beans that Zach grabbed. She didn't notice the movement of the walker in the kitchen until it was almost too late. It came stumbling from the pantry and Beth grabbed Zach's shirt, yanking him back. She withdrew her knife but he pushed her aside and killed it before she had a chance.

"Why do you keep doing that?" she said, annoyed.

"What?"

"Killing them? I'll never get any experience at it if you get in the way every time."

"Sorry," he said, holding up his hands in a sarcastic gesture of surrender. "Next one's all yours."

She rolled her eyes, heaved a sigh, and continued searching. When Michonne and Daryl came downstairs, carrying toilet paper and paper towels, as well as some bottles of medicines, Beth's sour mood drew their attention. They didn't say anything, though, which Beth was grateful for, and they left the house to move on to the next one. Once the trunk was full Michonne closed the lid and turned to Beth.

"You okay?"

"Every time I had a chance to kill a walker Sir Lancelot there would step in and interfere."

Michonne smiled. "He likes you."

"He's annoying."

"I take it you like him too?"

Beth shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe. We'll see."

…

"**_I found a rattler for Judy."_**

"Good. Thanks," Rick said distractedly, taking Judy from the crib at the foot of Beth's bed.

"When are you gonna stop being mad at me?"

Rick stopped on his way out but came back into the cell. "I'm not mad at you."

"You're so distant. I can tell you're pissed."

"What do you want, Beth? When I tried to get close you didn't want it. You made it clear you don't want me. Now I've backed off and you're still complaining? I'm giving you space."

"Feels like pouting."

"Pouting?"

Beth didn't speak. She thought she may have said too much or been unfair. He set Judy down in the crib and regarded Beth.

"What do you want from me?"

"I want your friendship. I want things to be how they used to be."

"You have my friendship. I'm sorry if my feelings changed things but we can't go back to how it was before."

"It doesn't seem like we're friends."

He sighed. "Would you be happier if I moped around like a lovesick schoolboy?"

"Of course not!"

"Good," he said on a nod. "Because that ain't me."

"I never said it was."

Rick stood before Beth, looking down at her with his intense blue eyes. She was suddenly very aware of him, his smell, his height, his muscles, the beard, his fucking chiseled cheekbones.

Rick was as different from Zach as night was to day, and Rick was definitely the day in that analogy. He was all blazing heat and glaring intensity, capable of burning her with only a look. Her heart was now racing as he took a step closer. She flinched only slightly when Rick reached out and wrapped a big hand around the back of her neck. His touch was intimate and she was surprised by how she responded to it with heat pooling low in her belly.

"I'm a man. Maybe that's too much for you to handle," he said in a low voice.

"I'm not a baby," she managed in a whisper.

"No, but maybe you're not the woman I thought you were."

He leaned in, pressing his lips to hers. Beth put her hands to Rick's chest, which had been hardened by work and maturity, intending to push him away but only succeeding in fisting handfuls of his sweaty, dirty shirt. He'd deftly slipped his tongue into her mouth and was kissing her like she'd never been kissed before. It was the kind of kiss she didn't even know could exist; slow, smooth…sensual.

He pulled away, leaving her breathless and lightheaded and aching all over her body, especially between her legs, where the heat was intense. She could only stand and mutely watch as he picked Judith up from the cradle and walk away with her. After a few moments she collapsed on the bed feeling confused and aroused at the same time, and she had no idea what to do next.

…

_**Date night didn't hold her attention**_ quite like she'd hoped. Zach came to her cell and walked her out to the court and Beth went along in silence, wearing a knee length summer dress and sandals. Zach complimented her and she plastered on a fake smile that she hoped he bought.

The closest to a good time people usually got was date night. It was the only time resources were used to power the stereo. They couldn't play the music too loudly but they could dance and enjoy a few drinks while they socialized around something that didn't involve work or killing walkers.

"Country music?" Zach scoffed. "No R&B, or rap, or rock?"

"They play what they have since the iTunes website is down at the moment," Beth answered, slightly annoyed by his attitude.

He picked up on her annoyance and they stood there awkwardly. Finally he asked if she wanted to dance and she agreed, letting him lead her onto the dance 'floor' to encircle her in his arms. Beth kept thinking about how she wanted to just go to her cell and write in her diary before turning in early.

Beth's eyes watched the others in the group. Not everyone had a date. Some came just to drink and listen to music and talk, and, hopefully, make a hook-up for the night while they were there. Glenn and Maggie weren't far away. They danced slowly, barely moving to the music, their heads on each other's shoulders, their eyes closed, just enjoying holding one another.

Zach pulled her very close and Beth rested her chin on his shoulder. Her mind immediately went to Rick. He'd felt much different to Zach; he'd felt much better to her, harder, manlier. He'd smelled better, too. Not that Zach didn't smell good, all freshly scrubbed for the date, he had, but Rick had smelled like…like sex on two feet.

She spotted him moving towards his fields and she pulled away from Zach. They'd danced to three songs straight, after all, and she'd let him get a little handsier than she probably should have.

"You okay?" he asked, when she backed away.

"Yeah, why?"

"You seem down."

Beth shrugged. "I've got a lot on my mind."

"Anything I can help with?"

She found his offer very sweet. Her smile was genuine when she said, "No, but thanks for offering. Listen, I need to talk to Rick about something. It's important."

"Huh?" Zach said, looking wrong footed by her sudden decision to leave. He almost seemed dazed by it.

"I'll be back in a minute," she promised, and sprinted off after Rick. She fell into step beside him, her heart thundering from more than the run.

"I've been thinking about what you said yesterday."

"And?"

"And…I think you're full of shit."

Rick stopped in his tracks, his eyebrows shooting up. "How so?"

"I'm not a psychologist, and I don't have a lot big fancy words, but you were trying to manipulate me, Rick. I don't know if you were goading me, or trying to use reverse psychology or what, but that line about me not being the woman you thought I was, or you being too much man for me? That's bullshit. You know what you did? You tried to make it out like it's some kind of honor that you're interested in me, and if I want to be with you I need to live up to some kind of standard you set."

"Beth—"

"Shut up, I'm not done. You're the one who fell first. Don't forget that. _You_ wanted me. _You're_ the one who made the first move. Then, when you didn't get what you wanted, you tried to make it out like it's my fault, like I did something wrong, and I'm gonna have to change myself to suit you. It's not right, Rick. If you're really okay with the age difference between us—"

"You're the one not okay with it."

"Yeah, and I was honest about it and told you! So like I was saying, if you're really okay with the age difference between us then you won't be the one to talk about me being a real woman and whether or not I can handle you or a relationship with you. I didn't start this, Rick, you did. Don't ever try to lay that crap on me again. If you can't see me as an equal, despite my age, then you need to forget about me."

She turned and stormed toward the dance, and her date, but looked back long enough to say, "Pout all you want. I'm not apologizing to you ever again. If you're not mature enough to handle rejection, and if you're not man enough not to try to manipulate me and my inexperience, then you don't deserve me."

She felt a hundred and ten percent better, happier, when she returned to Zach. This time the smile on her face was real. "Come on," she said, taking his hand. "Let's grab a drink."

…

_**The date went very well after**_ her talk with Rick. Beth and Zach danced, ate, and drank, and mingled with other people. Maggie and Glenn sat with them for awhile but near the end of the night, when things were winding down, they went off together to their cell and Beth had a pretty good idea what they planned to do.

Zach must have known what other couples were heading off to do, as well, and having a belly full of beer gave him the confidence to slip his hand very low on Beth's back where he rubbed there. "Want me to walk you to your cell?"

Beth nodded. She'd snuck a couple of beers as well and had a good buzz. She walked with Zach back to her cell and went in to light a few of the candles she had on a shelf to fill the tiny space with some light. Zach had drawn the privacy curtain and come inside.

"So…" he said.

Beth nodded. "Yeah. I had a good time."

"Me too."

He was leaning toward her but she turned her head to the side. "This is only our first date."

"I know but time is short and…" he swallowed and Beth faced him, giving a little nod.

He leaned in and lightly kissed her lips, which wasn't entirely unpleasant. Then he deepened it, which she allowed, and wrapped his arms around her.

Beth didn't know what she expected. The kiss with Rick had been something on a whole other level than this one. Jimmy hadn't been a fantastic kisser. His kisses had been kind of wet and sloppy, something she'd never really enjoyed. Zach wasn't sloppy but he was frantic, kissing her with a hard tongue that he slipped suggestively in and out of her mouth. It was clear the message he was sending but this kind of kiss wasn't something she wanted.

After a few moments she pulled back but Zach kind of chased her mouth, eventually putting his lips on her cheek and neck. It was hard, aggressive, demanding behavior and even with her buzz she wasn't into it. She pushed at his soft, boyish chest and backed away.

"I think it's time to say goodnight."

"Aw, come on. Things were going so well."

"Zach, really."

"Come on, Beth…" he insisted, and she could feel his erection pressing against her belly as he tried to pull her closer, tried to entice her.

"She said goodnight."

Rick's voice was the last she expected to her but she was grateful for it. Zach backed away from her in a hurry, like a child being caught with his hand in the proverbial cookie jar.

"Oh! Mr. Grimes!"

"Yeah," Rick said, tilting his head to the side as he coolly regarded Zach.

Beth knew what that head tilt meant, even though Zach didn't, and it wasn't good for him. Rick usually did that when he was about to take some kind of action and in Zach's case, action from Rick would lead to something bleeding, bruised, or possibly broken.

"Um…"

"Goodnight, Zach," Rick said, stepping back to give him room to leave.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Beth said.

"I'm sorry, but, is he related to you or something? I mean, you're eighteen and you're old enough—"

"Zach, goodnight, really," Beth said. She was more concerned for Zach than he was. He just didn't know he was playing with fire by sassing Rick.

He nodded, clearly ticked off, but he wasn't going to fight it. "Okay. Night, Beth."

"Night."

When he was gone, Rick looked back at her.

"I didn't need you to rescue me," she said hotly.

"He wasn't taking no for an answer."

"Did you really follow us back here?"

"No, I came to talk to you and saw you weren't alone and he wasn't taking the hint."

Beth crossed her arms. "What do you want?"

"I've thought about what you said," Rick said, coming into the cell and taking a seat on her bed.

"Make yourself at home," she said sarcastically, and leaned against the wall.

Rick regarded her as he did just that. "You were right. I didn't realize I was doing it but I was manipulating you. I used your inexperience against you."

"Yeah, you did."

"I apologize."

She swallowed, still kind of angry, but she appreciated he'd admit he was wrong and apologize. "Accepted."

"You said something that struck me. You said I fell _first_. Did you fall too?"

A frown creased her brow and she thought about it. "I…I don't know what I meant by that."

"Well, think about it," he said, standing up and coming to stand before her. He put his left hand against the wall and leaned over her.

There was that damned smell again. It wasn't cologne. It was something in his sweat. It was a little musky, mixing with the soap he showered in, and it was a very heady scent. It was attractive in a way that filled her senses and sent a pulse into the walls of her pussy where she could feel herself moisten. She wasn't sure why she reacted to Rick this way but she liked it, and she didn't feel it when she was close to Zach, or any other man for that matter.

Could she fall for Rick? She knew she could feel attraction to him but could she actually be in love with him?

"You are my equal. I'm not here to be your daddy," he said in that low, deep voice he had when he was close and speaking softly.

She watched him lift his hand and he dragged his index finger across the soft, slightly sweat moistened skin of her chest. It was a muggy evening and the dancing and the drinking had made her perspire. He breathed deep, enjoying the smell of her shampoo and sweat mingling together.

If he was willing to treat her as an equal and not try to daddy her then yes, she knew she could fall for him. He was a good man, and as her father said, the love of a good man shouldn't be undervalued.

"Could you fall for me, Beth?" he whispered, and the feel of his fingers grazing her flesh had her wet and aching and her belly quivering.

"Yeah…I could."

Her eyes were on his but they drifted shut as he closed the distance between them. This kiss was nothing like the debacle she'd just experienced with Zach. Rick drew away and looked into her eyes.

"I don't like the taste of another man on your lips," he said.

"Neither do I."

She closed the gap this time, determined to rid herself of Zach's flavor and replace it with Rick's. His hands came to rest on her body, one wrapped behind the small of her back while the other went low on her leg and slipped ever higher, lifting the flimsy material of her summer dress to grab at her leg. She eagerly looped it around his narrow waist and he pressed forward, grinding against her aching clit, eliciting a low moan from her that he breathed in as his tongue rubbed against hers. The ache in her body intensified. She'd never had sex but she knew, by instinct, she needed to be penetrated. She needed it like she needed air to survive.

Her small hands clutched at Rick's broad, strong shoulders as she moved in time with the suggestive movement of Rick's hips. He pulled away and looked into her eyes, pressing her hard into the wall.

"You ever done this before?"

She shook her head, her hair bouncing around her face, desperate for him to kiss her again.

"Your first time…"

"Yeah, touch me, don't stop, please…"

To her dismay he backed off, lowering her leg, removing his hands from her. "Not here against the wall. Not after a fight. Not your first time."

"But I want you."

"I want you too but I want it to mean something. It's not time yet."

"You're just gonna stop?"

She was trying not to get mad. She was failing.

"Yeah, because it's not right. Not for me. It's too soon."

"If I wasn't a virgin would you fuck me?"

"Probably, but not tonight, no matter how badly I want you. I want to do this right, Beth. I want to do right by you."

"Because of my age?"

"No. Because I love you. I'll see you tomorrow."

He kissed her again, somewhat chastely, on her forehead and then left her cell. She noticed he was walking a bit stiffly. He must have been as unfulfilled as she was. Her anger melted away when she lay down on the bed and stared up at the bunk above her. She rolled onto her side and squeezed her thighs together, feeling that desperate ache, that need for his touch, pulsing insistently. Her toes curled and she moaned into her pillow, but she was also smiling.

He wanted to do right by her.

Because he _loved_ her.


	4. Chapter 4

**_By the time Rick reached his_** cell his dick was so stiff he could hardly walk. He was just glad he didn't run into anyone and that Sasha had Judith for the night for some quality bonding time.

The taste of Beth's kiss was fading from his lips but it was fresh in memory. He could feel her warmth against him, remember her softness. It had taken everything he had, every ounce of willpower, not to slip into her right against the wall. He didn't regret his choice. He was going to wait until he knew in his heart that not only was she ready, but he was too. They needed time to get to know one another intimately, to get used to being together, before they crossed that final line.

There was also the matter of family. Lori hadn't been gone long enough for Carl to be able to accept a new woman in his life, especially one he'd once had a crush on. Neither was he entirely certain he was ready to delve into a deep emotional commitment.

Hershel, Maggie, and Glenn had to be considered too. His relationship with Beth wouldn't just involve her but it would involve her family as well. If they weren't okay with it it could cause a strain.

Rick pushed all such thoughts aside and thought only of Beth as he began to work away his erection.

…

**_Beth's birthday dawned cool and cloudy_**. It seemed to Beth, who slept in since she had the day free of responsibility, that she must have been wished happy birthday a dozen times before she could reach the shower. It started to wear thin but she knew everyone meant well so she smiled and said thank you for each well wish. Even Zach, who'd sulked over a week after she told him she was only interested in friendship, wished her a happy day.

Maggie and Glenn insisted she lunch with them, which she did, though she really wanted to rendezvous somewhere with Rick. All week she and Rick had stolen precious moments for a quick kiss, and light groping, when they exchanged Judith. They were too wary to risk more lest someone catch them.

After lunch Beth excused herself to go to the library to find a book and a quiet place to read. She wasn't aware she was being followed until a pair of strong arms circled around her.

"Happy Birthday," Rick whispered. "I'm sure you heard that a hundred times today."

"Not like that. Not so sexy."

"You think I sound sexy?"

"You sound sexy, you look sexy. You are sexy. Now shut up and kiss me."

"Yes, Miss Greene."

His tongue slipped into her mouth, tasting of peaches that had been brought in. She thirstily tasted him while he maneuvered her back into the stacks where it was very dark since there wasn't much light coming through the windows from the cloud cover. He hoisted her up onto a shelf where she sat and wrapped her legs around him.

"Somebody might come in."

"I wedged a chair under the doorknob."

"I want you."

"I want you too."

"What's holding you back?"

He tried to explain about wanting to be sure he was ready so soon after Lori, which was something she could respect.

"I'll try to be more patient. No more pressure."

"I know you have feelings, needs. I have them too," he said, pressing against her. God, what he wouldn't give to just not care about getting this right and not repeating mistakes he and Lori had made, so he could just fuck all of his lust and angst out right then and there. She'd pressed her forehead to his and nodded.

"Yeah. We can wait."

"Not for everything," he said suggestively. "I want to kiss you. I want to _taste_ you."

Beth gazed at him with a frown, reminding him once again of her innocence. She moved to kiss him but he pulled back, smiling down at her.

"It's not your mouth I want to kiss," he said, unbuttoning her jeans and then bringing the zipper slowly down.

"Oh," she said, catching on. "Oh…okay."

"It's not something you have to do, Beth."

"No, it's okay. I've always wondered what that feels like."

"It feels very, very good."

She bit her lip with a timid smile. "Show me, then."

She lifted her hips so he could pull her jeans and panties down. She kicked off her sneakers so he could pull them easily off. She was so sexy sitting there, her hair in a ponytail, naked from the waist down, her perky tits pointed with nipples that were bigger than he'd imagined they'd be. His cock twitched with need. God, he really was a pervert, doing this with an eighteen-year-old, but damn if he'd stop.

Her breath came fast, her cheeks colored rosily as she sat there, exposed to him. He got down on his knees before her. She lifted her shirt off, pulling her bra with it, now completely naked. He took time to suckle each of her hardened nipples, eliciting small gasps of delight from her. Those gasps flattened into pants as his lips moved steadily lower, over her quivering belly.

He shifted first to the inside of one thigh, then the other, dragging out the anticipation. Her eyes were dark and smoky with lust as she watched him. He kept his own gaze locked on hers as he pressed his tongue flat against her slit, which was moist, and gave one long lick.

"Oh…" she whimpered, before her head fell back and she became wetter.

Her thighs were draped over his shoulders and they tightened instinctively when he found her hardened clit and began to suckle. His entire body ached with need at every gasp and whimper that escaped her.

"Oh, Rick…Oh God…Rick…" she said, panting his name in a way that he was sure she wasn't even sure she was conscious of. It was driving him mad with need. He lapped hungrily at her before he claimed her clit again and slipped two fingers inside her tight, wet folds.

There was a hiss of pain and something warm flowed over his fingers. He realized he'd gotten too excited and gone too far. He withdrew, grateful there was no blood.

"Don't stop, please," she begged.

He was only too happy to oblige. He went back to suckling her and laid one hand flat on her tummy, feeling her quiver as she finally found release on a loud moan.

Rick wiped his bearded chin and stood up. She looked like she was ready to melt to the floor but she managed to sit upright.

"God, that was incredible," she said. "The best thing I've ever felt in my life."

He smiled, pleased with himself, pleased for her. Beth's eyes were glued to his bulging jeans. She was reaching for him when they heard the rattle at the door and someone knocked.

"Shit," she said, jumping down and scrambling for her clothes. Rick took off his shirt and wrapped it around his waist, letting the material bunch in front of him to hide his erection. Topless now, he quickly kissed her and then hurried to the window to climb out.

"I'll see you soon," he whispered, leaving her to finish fixing her clothes.

"I'm coming!" Beth said, grabbing the nearest book, some trashy romance novel she was sure the purple prose of which couldn't match the real deal, and moved the chair from the door to reveal Carol on the other side.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, I was just trying to find a secluded place to read. I'll finish my book in my cell," she said, hurrying along before Carol could question the sweat on her brow or the window Rick had left open.

…

**_Dinner that night was a surprise for Beth_**. Maggie came to pick her up. Instead of leading her to the grill, like usual, she took her to the council room where she found it had been decorated with colorful streamers and a big Happy Birthday sign Carol had strung up on one of the walls. A small feast of grilled deer that Daryl had caught, as well as fresh roasted vegetables, as well as fruit from Rick's garden, had been laid out. A small basket full of goodies had been put together as well. It didn't matter if the chocolate was stale. It was a wonderful gift.

Beth hadn't realized how sick she was of canned goods until she started munching on fresh vegetables and slices of tomatoes she'd loaded up on her plate. The dinner was a festive affair with gifts given by each of them.

Carol gave her some scrunchies for her hair, all of them in bright, cheerful colors. Maggie and Glenn presented her with bracelets and some silver rings they'd found out on their runs. Her father gave her a set of leather-bound books of some of the world's best classic stories, something that would entertain her for a long time to come. Some of them she'd read, some she hadn't, but she looked forward to enjoying them on the days when she had nothing to do but busywork. Carl gave her a special edition Superman comic that was still wrapped in plastic. She thought he perhaps didn't want to really part with it was being a good sport. Daryl gave her a bouquet of wild roses he'd taken time to clip the thorns from. Michonne gave her a small knife that would be easy to handle and used for anything from pairing apples to killing walkers. Beth liked the pearl handle and the pretty design etched into it.

Lastly Rick presented her with a machete that looked battle worn and had a bright red handle.

Maggie moaned at Rick's gift. "A machete? Rick…"

"No, I really like it!" Beth said enthusiastically, picking the long blade up. It was very shiny with a sharpened edge that could split a hair clean down the middle.

"Be careful with it," Glenn said, side-eying the machete. "You could lose a finger just holding that thing."

"I'll give you some lessons on how to use it, if you like," Michonne offered.

"I'd like that."

"Please do," Maggie agreed. "It's not a toy Beth."

"And she's not a baby," Rick cut in, causing Maggie to raise a brow at the salt in his tone. "She's a responsible young woman."

"Agreed," Hershel said, before Maggie could sass. "Now, let's let Beth take her gifts and go enjoy the rest of her birthday."

Beth sheathed the machete and gave everyone a kiss on their way out, even Daryl, who looked like he'd rather she attacked him with her new machete than try to put her lips on him. She added insult to injury with a hug that he was all too happy to escape from, making Rick laugh.

When it was Rick's turn for a kiss Beth felt her face heating up. The last time she'd been in contact with those lips they'd been firmly planted all over her nethers and she felt herself moisten from the memory. Her father, however, hung back.

"Rick, a word?"

Beth looked around Rick to her father, who winked at her, and she relaxed.

"Come on," Michonne said. "I'll help you carry all this."

"Thanks."

Rick hung back once everyone was gone, his feelings of curiosity tinged with anxiety, and sat down across from Hershel. The older man seemed to be thinking very hard, clearly anxious to choose his words carefully.

"Beth tells me there's an older man interested in her."

Rick gulped, his mind immediately going to his encounter with Hershel's baby girl in the library. God, if the old man only knew he'd probably grab Beth's machete and come after him. He bravely met the older man's eyes and was surprised to see no condemnation there.

"Do you love her?" Hershel asked.

_He knows, fuck_, Rick thought. He pursed his lips, he raked his teeth over his lower lip, he rubbed his face, wondering how he was going to respond. Finally he decided on the truth.

"Yes," he finally admitted.

Hershel only nodded.

"You must be very upset. Very disappointed in me."

"Not at all," Hershel said, surprising him.

"What?"

"I was two years older than you are now when I met my first wife, Jo, and she was younger than Beth. I've been where you are, I know exactly what kind of conflict you're feeling. You're one of the most honorable men I know. I don't have a problem with the age difference, Rick. I just want to make sure you'll do right by her and I think you will. I want her safe, and happy, and I think you can provide her with both of those things. I want to know she's with a man who will not only treat her right but will love her with all his heart. I trust you to honor her, and what she means to me and Maggie."

"Of course I will. I do love her and I…I can't explain why. I don't know how this happened," he said.

"Love very rarely makes sense, Rick," Hershel said, smiling. "How do you plan to tell Carl, if you decide to tell him at all?"

"I don't know. I'm thinking of keeping our relationship a secret for awhile. He needs more time. I know he's not ready to see me with someone new and…"

"And maybe you're not ready for everyone to know," Hershel said knowingly.

"I forget Maggie was around Carl's age when you and Annette got together."

Hershel nodded. He smiled fondly when he thought about those days, "Boy, was she mad, but I knew she'd come around. She accepted Annette and Carl will accept Beth. He'll just have to do it in his own time. The circumstances aren't exactly the same but that doesn't matter. I know kids. I know that they accept change a lot easier than adults and they adjust. They're also capable of more understanding than we often give them credit for. I trust you'll handle this well and do what's right for you, for Beth, and for Carl."

"I appreciate your trust in me, Hershel."

"You've earned my trust time and again." Hershel offered Rick his hand, and they shook. "Welcome to the family, Rick."

"Does this mean I call you Dad?"

"Not a chance," Hershel said with a wink, making both himself and Rick chuckle. "In all seriousness, I can't think of a better man than you to have as a son-in-law, should that day ever come. If something should happen to me I can die in peace knowing that both my girls have good people to look after them in this terrible world. Now off you go. I'm sure you'd like to spend some time with Beth. I know she'd like to see you, too. I plan to keep Judy tonight. She gets a kick tugging on my beard and pinching my big old nose."

"What about Maggie? Are you going to tell her? Should I?"

"She'll figure it out and when she does I suggest you keep a look out for her hands. That girl's got a vicious right hook on her."

…

**_Rick felt a lot less conflicted_** when he left his cell that night to go to the showers, and then to Beth's cell. He was still reeling from his talk with Hershel. He not only knew but the old man was okay with him and Beth. That made a world of difference.

He'd barely gotten the cell door closed and the privacy curtain pulled before Beth was in his arms, her lips on his.

"What did Daddy say?"

"He knows."

Beth nodded. "He and I talked. I just wanted you to get there when you were ready," she said.

"I'm glad you did. Now enough talk," he said, smothering her lips with his. He put his hands everywhere he could get them. Beth had made it easy with a short shirt that she wore. He suddenly realized, when he looked down at her, that it was his.

"This mine?" he said, feeling his cock stiffen at the sight of his shirt draped over her naked body.

"Yeah. I got it from the laundry. I hope you don't mind."

"Hell no I don't mind. God…"

He was backing her toward her bunk and banged his head, making Beth giggle. He shushed her and carefully eased her down but she surprised him by flipping him over onto his back.

"There's something I want to see," she said.

"What?"

"You. I've never seen a man in real life. Only in pictures. I want to see it."

There was something deeply erotic knowing that his cock would be the first one Beth ever saw. He worked his shirt off and then his jeans and shoes. Finally all that was left was his boxers. She lowered them, freeing his erection, and a look of wonder came into her eyes before a light moan escaped her lips. She sat there, on her knees, and he saw her cheeks color.

"I'm embarrassed."

"Why?"

"I don't know what to do now," she said, biting her lip, feeling stupid and inadequate.

"What do you want to do?"

"Touch you."

"Then touch me."

"But it won't be good."

Rick was stroking her hair away from her face. "It'll be good."

"Not for you. Lori had experience. Lori—"

"Lori's gone," he said. He didn't want his dead wife's ghost coming into his bed with Beth. He didn't want Beth to compare herself to her memory. "You're getting your experience now. Don't be embarrassed. I'm not comparing you to her."

Beth nodded.

"Do what you want. Let instinct guide you."

Beth knew what a blowjob was she'd just never given one. Rick was rock hard and he lay back, watching her with a smile on his lips, waiting for her to do what she wanted. So she did what she thought was right, what felt right, by putting him into her mouth as far as she could take him.

"Yeah," he whispered. "Like that. Suck as you pull back," he instructed. "Careful not to let your teeth graze me. Keep your mouth as wet as you can."

"Like this?" she said, doing as instructed.

"Just like that," he said breathlessly.

He told her other things he liked. She did them all, catching on quickly, and very soon Rick was lying there, on his back, watching his cock slide in and out of Beth's mouth. Acting on instinct her right hand went between her legs where she rubbed at her clit.

A loud, involuntary moan slipped out of Rick's mouth. He didn't want anyone to come running, especially to Beth's cell, so he grabbed the thin pillow under his head and covered his face. She'd picked up her pace, was sucking hard, pumping him with her small hand as she did it, driving him ever closer to the edge. All of his moans were going into the pillow, which he bit to try to keep quiet. Faster and faster she worked him, little whimpers of need escaping her as she worked not only him but herself, until he could take it no longer and he came, his shouts of pleasure muffled by the pillow he now had firmly pressed against his face.

When he trusted himself to be quiet, Rick looked up to see Beth's mouth was covered in his come. It was the most erotic thing he'd ever seen. She was licking her lips, wiping at her mouth, trying to deal with the sheer amount of it.

"Sorry I gagged a little," she said, embarrassed.

He hadn't heard that. He'd been too wrapped up in the moment.

"You okay?"

She nodded, cleaning her face off with his shirt. He pulled it over her head so she could lie flush against him, naked, skin on skin.

"Beth? My God are you—"

"Shit," Beth said, hearing Maggie's footsteps. There was no time to get dressed. There was no time to do anything.

"Beth!"

The door of her cell opened and the privacy curtain was thrown back and Maggie stood there, her mouth hanging open. She was pale, shaking, and looked shocked as she took in the sight of her baby sister naked in bed with Rick, some of his come still on her chin. Beth swiped at it while Maggie stood there, her shock turning to rage. She had something in her hand, a teddy bear, that dropped to the floor.

"I heard moans. I thought…" Maggie whispered. "You…You…"

Rick quickly got out of bed, struggling to cover his nakedness by grabbing his shirt off the floor. "Maggie, listen, I know this…well…it must come as a shock but—"

He felt hot pain on the left side of his jaw and he was falling. He'd forgotten to keep a lookout for Maggie's hands, as Hershel had told him should she ever find out about him and Beth. The old man had been right: She had a vicious right hook.


	5. Chapter 5

"**_Maggie, stop!" Beth shouted, trying to_** prevent her sister from kicking Rick in the stomach-again. She shoved her sister back and planted herself between her sister and boyfriend.

"What the hell?"

That was Daryl's voice, as though things couldn't get any worse. He yanked the curtain back, took one look at Beth and Rick in the nude and turned right back around.

"Daryl!" Maggie shouted, when she saw he was leaving.

"Huh-uh," he said, steadfastly keeping his back turned.

"Do something!"

"What the fuck you expect me to do?"

Maggie was at a loss for words as Rick struggled to his feet. He and Beth quickly dressed while Maggie glared at the two of them.

"How could you?" she asked Rick. "She's just a kid!"

"Rick isn't the problem here Maggie. You are," Beth said cooly.

"How am I the problem?"

Beth scooped the teddy bear off the floor and pressed it to Maggie's chest.

"I'm not just a kid."

"Yeah? You think you're all grown up? We'll see what Daddy says about this. We'll call the council on you, Rick! You sick pervert!"

"Hershel knows. He gave us his blessing," Rick told her.

It was obvious Maggie didn't believe him for a second.

"He does, Maggie. Go on, get him. He'll tell you."

Maggie took Beth by the hand, her grip tight as a vice, inescapable, and dragged her toward their father's cell in another part of the block. He was putting Judith down to sleep when Maggie burst in.

"You'll never guess what I just walked in on!"

"Shush! You'll wake the baby."

He pushed Maggie into the corridor and Beth wrested herself from her sisters grip.

"Come with me."

His tone brooked no argument so Maggie and Beth followed. When they reached the council room he closed the door.

"Go on, tell him. Or I will."

"Maggie caught me with Rick in an…intimate moment."

"I see."

His calm tone and lack of surprise was a shock to Maggie. Beth and Rick had been telling the truth. He knew.

"You really do know? You _actually_ gave them your blessing?"

"You didn't complain when I gave you and Glenn my blessing."

"That's different! I'm a grown woman and Beth's—"

"So am I," Beth interjected.

"You are not. You're a kid. You're my baby sister. Daddy, how _could_ you?"

"Maggie, I could go into a longwinded explanation about how this world forced people to grow up fast and that Beth doesn't have the same kind of time to experience things in this life that you had before the turn. I could tell you how there isn't much of a difference between Beth and Rick and my own history with your mama, Jo. I won't do that. You know these things already. I will say that I've thought about it long and hard and I approve of the match. I don't have a problem with Rick and Beth falling in love and being together. Now, if you do, you're going to have to work that out on your own. All I want from you is to keep an open mind and keep your mouth shut, especially around Carl."

"You don't want him to know his daddy is a pedophile? Fine, I won't tell him."

"That's enough! I'm not a child, Maggie!" Beth shouted, angrier than she'd ever been with her sister. "Do me a favor and butt out of my life!"

Beth stormed away but Maggie chased after her. "Oh, that's really mature, running away."

"Just like it was mature for you to attack him?" Beth shot back. She stopped and faced Maggie. "You keep your mouth shut. Word has a way of spreading and I don't want this getting back to Carl. He's not ready to know. You can hate Rick all you want but don't you dare do a thing—"

Maggie snorted derisively. Beth had never seen her sister so hostile, so nasty and mean. "You think he's ever gonna call you Mommy? For God's sake, he tried to date you once!"

Beth backed away, shaking her head. "Go cool off, Maggie. Until you apologize to Rick I don't want anything to do with you."

"That'll be a cold day in hell."

Beth stormed away, leaving her seething sister in the corridor, watching her stalk back to her cell. Daryl was talking to Rick. He looked very uncomfortable in her presence and Beth suspected it had to do with seeing her in the buff.

"So you saw me naked. It's not the end of the world, Daryl," Beth snapped.

"I gotta go," he answered, and hurried off toward his own cell.

"I'll bet the whole damn prison knows now with all the ruckus Maggie caused," Beth said miserably, sitting down on her bunk.

"I don't know. I hope not. Nobody else came around," Rick said. He took her hand in his and then realized she was crying.

"Are you okay?" she asked wetly.

"Yeah. Are you?"

"Maggie was just awful. I can't believe she punched and kicked you."

Rick found himself smiling, despite his injuries, which were fairly minor. He'd had worse. "She was defending her sister."

"I'm furious with her."

"Don't be. This came as a shock to her."

"How can you be so forgiving?"

Rick shrugged. "I'd have done the same if I had a little sister and caught her in bed with the group leader."

"You'd have treated her like a child? Humiliated her? Beaten her lover?"

Her lover.

That brought a smile to Rick's lips.

"Probably, but I would have felt really bad about it after. She'll either accept us together or she won't. We can't force her, Beth. Come on. It's late. Let's lie down."

"Lock the door this time," she said. "We don't need any more surprise guests."

When he came back to bed he kissed her softly on the side of her head and held her close. With him behind her, she felt much better, but she was still worried.

"You won't put an end to us because of her, will you?"

"No," he said.

"I love you."

He kissed her softly again. "I love you, too."

…

**_The next couple of weeks were tense_**. Maggie was civil when Carl was around but she turned cold as ice when he wasn't there. Carl wasn't stupid. He knew something was going on.

"Hershel?"

"Carl, come in," the older man said, when Carl came to his cell to drop Judith off. "What can I do for you?"

"I need to talk but I don't want to talk to Dad because it's about him."

"I see. Well, tell me what's on your mind, son."

Carl took a moment to gather his thoughts. He had a lot of information he'd gleaned from observing everyone but he couldn't put it together.

"Do you think Dad may have a girlfriend?"

"What makes you think he does?"

"He seems different. Kind of happy."

"Does that bother you?" asked Hershel.

"No, it's good he's happy but…but…"

"Your mom hasn't been gone that long."

Carl nodded. "They hated each other at the end. They weren't happy, I know that but I don't know. It's weird. I don't like the idea that he's forgotten Mom that fast."

"Carl, as a man who has been married, divorced, and widowed twice, I can tell you without any doubt whatsoever that Rick has not forgotten Lori. A man never forgets a wife, whether he's had only one or if he's had five."

"Then how could he date someone else so soon if he still loves Mom?"

"I still love my first wife, Jo. I loved her when we divorced. I loved her even after she died in that car accident. I'll love her to my dying breath."

"You can really love two women?" he said, looking confused and sad. Hershel's heart went out to the boy. He knew it must have been really hard for him to understand what was happening, even if he didn't know the identity of the woman his father was with now.

"Yes, absolutely. I know this is hard for you to understand but your mom and dad didn't hate each other. They loved each other very much. That's why Rick struggled so hard with her death. That kind of love runs deep and it lasts a lifetime. No matter who your father falls in love with he's always, always going to love Lori. He's got enough room in his heart for her and he has room in his heart for someone new. Never doubt that he loves you and Judith, too. The capacity of the human heart to love is endless. I know this from firsthand experience. Doesn't make it easier to accept your dad with someone new, I know, but in time, as you mature and grow, you'll understand that."

Carl nodded but he still looked deeply unhappy. "I wonder who she is."

"You'll know that when he's ready for you to know. Give him time to tell you. When he's ready, he will. Carl, it's okay if you're angry about it. It's okay to be unhappy for awhile. You don't have to be happy but you will have to accept it. It wouldn't be fair for you to expect your father to go the rest of his life alone, lonely, especially with the way this world is. Your dad can sometimes seem superhuman but let me assure you, he's just a man, same as me, same as Daryl, or Glenn, or anyone else. He has feelings, too, but that doesn't mean he doesn't love your mom, or will forget her, or put anyone else above you and Judith. I know he'd _never_ do that."

He left Hershel's cell and the older man watched him go, hoping his words would bring the boy some comfort.

…

**_When Maggie showed no signs of_** relenting or coming around to the idea of her sister and Rick as a couple, Rick decided to take a step toward bridging the gap. Glenn hadn't liked it at first, probably still didn't, but he'd accepted that there was nothing he could do to change it, Rick and Beth had Hershel's blessing, and at the end of the day it just wasn't any of his business.

He climbed the guard tower and closed the trap door before going to stand beside Maggie, who leaned against the railing, keeping an eye out for danger.

"I've said what I have to say to you, Rick."

"I haven't said what I have to say."

"Then say it and go."

"I love her."

Maggie's smile was one of bitterness tinged with disgust. She shook her head and looked at him. "You love her? Really?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"I don't know."

"I do. You're crazy. You lost your mind when you lost Lori. You lost your moral center."

"I'm the same man I always was."

"Are you, Rick?"

"I guess if I'm an amoral pedophile then your father must be, too."

This time he was ready for the right hook. This time he wouldn't simply take an ass kicking. He blocked the blow and shoved her away from him with as much force as he dared. Enough to let her know he wasn't playing around.

"Who the hell do you think you are?"

"Hershel was thirty-eight when your mother fell in love with him at sixteen. I'm thirty-six and Beth is eighteen. They waited until she was eighteen then married. Is Hershel rotten at his core? Is he a pedophile?"

Maggie crossed her arms and leaned back against the glass of the guard tower. Of course she didn't see her father as a pedophile. He was the best man she knew. Rick and Beth weren't doing anything her own parents hadn't done. The two men weren't all that different.

"Are you sure this is about the age difference or something else?" Rick asked.

"I don't know what you mean."

"I mean you don't want Beth to grow up. You want her to stay forever young and innocent in your eyes?"

She couldn't exactly argue that. She couldn't even bring herself to meet Rick's gaze. She just stared out at the prison yard.

"If you really think I'm an indecent man, a pervert, then I'm sorry. I'm none of those things, Maggie. I'm just a man who fell in love. I can't help that the first person my heart opened up to was Beth. She accepted me. She loves me. I love her. We're going to be together. I'd just really like it if we could go back to being friends, trusting one another. I promise you one thing. I will always do everything in my power to keep her safe. I'll treat her right. I'll never hurt her. That's all I've got and if it's not good enough for you, I'm sorry."

Rick left Maggie alone with her thoughts and descended to the ground. She watched him cross the yard, heading for his crops, a jumble of thoughts and feelings going through her mind and heart.

…

**_That night, after dropping Judith off_**with Rick, Beth took a shower and then returned to her cell, exhausted. She'd not only been babysitting all day but she'd manned the grill and washed clothes and helped clean out some of the offices in the administration wing to make room for supplies brought in from Daryl and Michonne's runs. There were new people coming in, including someone with medical experience named Bob Stookey.

Beth almost didn't notice the letter lying on her desk. She picked it up, feeling it had weight, and opened it. Inside was a note from Maggie … and three condoms.

_I reckon you could do a lot__  
><em>_worse than Rick Grimes. Be__  
><em>_careful. I have more when you__  
><em>_need them. _

_Maggie xoxo_

Beth smiled. That was as close to an apology as Maggie was going to get and Beth could accept it. Still, she wanted to know that her sister had worked things out with Rick. She wasn't okay with her treatment of him.

"Guess who shook my hand today?"

"Where's Judy?"

"With Carl."

Beth was still toweling her hair when she looked up at Rick, who stood in the doorway of the cell, smiling at her.

"Who shook your hand?"

"Maggie."

"Without trying to trick you into losing your balance so she could stomp you into the ground?" she said with mock surprise.

Rick was grinning when he sat next to her. "Silently and stiffly but she shook it. She and I talked this morning."

"She's accepted it," Beth said, holding up one of the condoms. Rick regarded it before looking at her.

"Want to use one?" she asked, smiling playfully.

There was nothing playful about Rick putting his hand on her inner thigh. "Yeah," he said.

"Come here," Beth answered, pulling him into a kiss.

She was always amazed by how quickly her body responded to him. He could make her heart race and her pussy moisten with nothing but a glance. They began yanking off their clothes and before long she was lying under him, naked, while he trailed kisses down her body. He'd been thirsting for her since her birthday but he hadn't indulged again until now.

Beth's body was humming with need by the time she felt the first finger slip in. It was pleasant but it only made her body ache for more. His lips were on hers again when he added a second finger and went deeper until there was a sharp pain. She hissed and he stopped, withdrawing his fingers and situating himself above her. She felt the head of his cock teasing pressure against her clit. Sweet pulses of desire replaced any discomfort left by his fingers.

"It's okay. I know it'll hurt," she whispered. "I still want this."

After rolling on one of the condoms Rick slowly, very slowly, began to push into her, filling her, stretching her in ways she'd never imagined, and it did hurt. He was gentle, he was slow, and even though the pain persisted Beth wouldn't have traded it for the world. She was finally as close to Rick as it was possible for her to be and the love she had for him made her heart swell almost painfully…

"Tell me," she whispered, as she felt him reach his climax.

"I love you…"

…

**_Beth was sore in the morning_**. She also wasn't alone. Normally Rick waited until she fell asleep before going back to his cell but this time he'd stayed. It was still dark out when she awoke in his arms to find him already up, watching her. He smiled and kissed her brow.

"Morning."

"Morning," she said, and ran her fingers through the hairs of his chest.

"You okay?"

"Better than ever. I've never been this happy. I didn't think it was possible."

"I haven't felt this complete in a long time," he confessed.

After a few moments of silence, holding one another, enjoying the feel of waking up together, Rick had to get up.

"I need to be in my cell when Carl gets up," he said.

Beth nodded. "Have you thougth about telling him?"

"I have but it isn't time. He already suspects I'm seeing someone. He's not okay with it yet but I think he's coming around to the idea."

"Does he have a clue it's me?"

"I don't think so."

He kissed her again and then got up to get dressed. When he was gone Beth also got up, deciding to start her day early. She needed a shower and wash her sheets. There was blood in them, blood sticking her thighs together, and she hurt, but it was fading. She smiled as she imagined being able to make love with Rick without pain and hoped that time would come soon.

…

**_There was something wrong with the pigs_**. Violet, as Carl called her, no longer attempted to get up. Rick watched her sleeping at the back of the pen and wondered what was going on. He had this depressing feeling that something terrible was on the horizon. That feeling was only made worse by the presence of so many walkers lining the fences. It was like the outside world had decided they'd enjoyed enough safety and security and was determined to destroy what they had.

He hoped he was wrong but experience had taught Rick that when it came to the worst that could happen he was always right.

…

**_Once Beth finished with her sword_** fighting lessons with Michonne for the day she sheathed the blade. Rick was approaching and he had a look on his face that said he was there for her, not Michonne.

"I saw your form while you practiced," he said. He looked at Michonne. "You think she's ready to put her skills to real world use?"

"I think she could handle herself against one or two. I wouldn't recommend her trying to take on more than that yet," she answered.

"Want to join me? I'm going to check the traps. You can act as my bodyguard."

"I'll bet," Michonne smirked, and then started for the prison. She was one of the few who didn't look angry, confused, or disgusted by the fact that Rick and Beth were together. Daryl and Hershel were the other two.

Beth walked with Rick through the gate, waving at Glenn who was on guard duty. Her brother-in-law waved back before looking away. He seemed to have a difficult time looking at her when she was with Rick. That bothered her. When would he, and Maggie for that matter, accept the choices she and Rick had made? When would they stop judging?

The walk into the woods was a peaceful one. It was a hot, bright day but in the trees it was noticeably cooler, pleasant even, with the shade casting the ground in shadows. Once they were out of the line of sight of the prison Rick took Beth's hand, lacing his fingers with hers, and they walked on in comfortable silence.

"Did you really want to check the traps or is this a date?" she asked after awhile.

"I want to check the traps but I don't think there's going to be anything good. I mostly want to spend some time with you away from prying eyes and ears."

"Walker," Beth said sighing.

"Want to test out your skills?"

"Absolutely."

She drew the machete and approached the walker that was coming toward her. It was a large male and she took up a battle stance. She swung—and missed.

"Shit," she said, having used the blade too soon. She backed up a step and tried again. This time she cut its head in half. It dropped disgustingly to the ground.

"Yes," she said, and turned. Her joy turned to alarm when she saw a walker was coming close to Rick.

"Behind you!"

He turned just in time. He'd already had his knife out, in case Beth needed assistance. He used it to take down the gaunt, rotted woman who'd reached for him.

"Beth," Rick said, hearing approaching footsteps.

"I see them."

There were four walkers approaching. Beth and Rick stood with their backs to the other, waiting for the things to get close. She used the moves Michonne had taught her and ran the first of the two walkers coming her way. The second she took out by driving the machete down into its skull and pulling back.

When it was over Beth wiped her machete and stood to face Rick.

"You handled yourself beautifully," he commented with pride.

"I feel like Xena."

Rick laughed and took her hand, leading her deeper into the woods, near the traps.

"Lori loved that show. One Halloween she came into the bedroom dressed like her and…" his voice trailed off. "Sorry."

"It's okay to talk about her, Rick," Beth replied softly. "I'm not that insecure."

"Yeah, but I'd rather not. Especially a story like that."

She squeezed his hand and came to a stop.

"Something wrong?" he asked.

"My blood's pumping from the fight," she said.

Rick allowed his eyes to deliberately travel from her luscious lips to her booted feet and back up again. "That so?" he asked, moving to rest his hands on her hips.

She nodded and looked up at him. There wasn't a huge height difference between them. She liked that. He was backing her toward a tree. She liked that too. She liked the way he started to kiss her, rough and fast, and deep. She enjoyed the way his hands kneaded her ass and she enjoyed how he felt pressed against her when her back came into contact with the tree.

"Turn around," he said, and Beth happily obliged while Rick's hands deftly unfastened her jeans and slipped into her panties.

A strangled sigh escaped from Beth when he played his fingers over her slit, teasing her, making her wet. He'd push the tips of a couple of fingers in, just enough to make her body ache for penetration, and then slip out again to come to her clit. She bit her lip, trying to keep quiet. Last thing she wanted was for more walkers to come their way to interrupt. It seemed to her she always had to be quiet. When they were at the prison they had to keep it hush-hush.

"Don't hold back. We'll be all right. I think we got all the walkers in the area," he said, sensing her efforts to remain as quiet as possible. "Enjoy this the way you want."

She let out the breath she hadn't been aware she was holding. She became so caught up in the sensations of Rick's hand between her thighs nothing else mattered. It was a welcome respite from the dangers and the stress of her life.

When she was ready for him, when she was begging him, he removed the condom he'd brought from his wallet and rolled it on. Then he positioned himself at her entrance and slid slowly, gently in. She wasn't as tight this time. There was no hint of pain this time. She even pushed back against him, trying to take him in faster than he expected.

A long, low moan came from deep within Beth as she took him in. Rick closed his eyes and remained still for a moment. She was gloriously tight and so wet. She moved first, and he took the hint, moving within her slowly at first but picking up pace whenever he felt her adjust to the movement—to him.

There was no pain this time. Their first time, a few days ago, had hurt like a sonofabitch. This time Beth felt only mild discomfort at the start. Now that she'd adjusted she leaned against the tree feeling sweat bead on her skin, one of Rick's fingers massing her clit while the other toyed with her nipples under her shit.

"Fuck, Beth," he whispered.

There was something deeply erotic about having him move inside her, the feel of Rick's breath on her neck, and the feel of his hands on her body. The sounds he made turned her on. His breath came fast and short as he pumped into her, occasionally accentuated with a moan or a whimper of need.

This wasn't Beth's first time coming but it was the best so far. She orgasmed powerfully, clenching his cock deep inside, her juices exploded from her, gushing over his balls and running down her thighs as she screamed his name.

…

**_They enjoyed a swim in a_**sunny creek and then lay on the shore naked, drying off in the sun, talking and cuddling. There came a moment when Beth wanted to fall asleep but she knew that would be dangerous, so she kept talking to keep herself and Rick awake.

"What did you say was wrong with the pigs?"

"I don't know," Rick said, pulling his clothes on. "They've come down with something and they're only getting worse."

When they were both dressed they took the sack that carried a fairly decent haul of fat rabbits and squirrels and started for home. They passed a dog that had seen better days. It's matted fur was an infested mess and it collapsed near the walkers he and Beth had killed earlier. Blood suddenly burst from its eyes and it whined pitifully.

"Do something, please," Beth said, feeling sorry for the animal.

Rick went over and it tried to crawl away, having long ago learned not to trust people. Rick wanted to pet it, soothe it, but he didn't know what kind of sickness it may have so he moved behind it and drove his knife into its skull. He wiped the blade on the grass before sheathing it and then continuing on with Beth.

"I don't know what's going on with these animals but I have a feeling it's going to be bad news," he said. Beth silently agreed before taking Rick's hand and continuing the walk home.

…

_**Rick walked Beth back to her**_ cell where she gathered things to take to the wash. He lingered in the doorway to watch her, thinking how happy he was to be with her, and wondering when it would be the right time to tell Carl.

His son really was the only thing that held him back from coming out in the open about his relationship with Beth. He didn't want to do anything that would cause a rift between himself and his son but at the same time he wanted to be open. He hated the sneaking around. It made it feel like he was doing something wrong even though he didn't feel like he was. Not anymore.

Time, Rick thought, was what Carl needed. He needed time to come to terms with Lori's death and the idea that his father was only human.

"Something wrong?" Beth asked, looking up at him.

"I…"

She waited. Her face was the perfect expression of curiosity and patience.

"What?"

"I want us to be open. I don't like hiding what we have. Don't ever think I'm ashamed of us."

She kissed him lightly on the lips and went back to sorting clothes. "I know you're not ashamed of us. I'm not either. You'll know when the time is right to tell Carl."

"Are you a mind-reader?"

"Nope. I've just really gotten to know you."

"Hey," Daryl said, appearing at the door. "We got a situation. I found a few people on the side of the road not far from here, hurt when their car flipped over. Hershel needs some pain meds and other stuff that he's gonna run out of before morning. Michonne just left to look for the Governor and everybody's busy. You up for a run? I need backup I can trust."

He was asking Beth directly, not asking Rick for permission or to make the decision for her, something Rick and Beth both respected and appreciated. Plus, the fact that he trusted Beth over older people he could ask, including Rick, pleased Beth. She threw her clothes aside and grabbed her machete.

"I'm good to go."

"We're taking the bike."

Rick kissed Beth long and deep. "Be careful."

"Of course I will."

…

_**Rick hadn't had a bad feeling**_ about Beth leaving but when the sun started to set and then hours passed beyond that he was pacing the corridor outside his cell, seriously considering going out after Daryl and Beth, should something turn out to be wrong. As though reading his mind Hershel came for a visit.

"There's a reason we don't go out after dark," Hershel said. "Can't see anything."

"I'd say this qualifies as an emergency," Rick says. "We leave after dark for emergencies."

"Daryl is a capable man and Beth isn't defenseless," Hershel pointed out. "If they're not back by noon tomorrow go after them then."

"If they're not back by ten I'm going," Rick said.

Hershel nodded his agreement and then left. He looked as worried as Rick felt, more so, but he was right. It wouldn't do any good to go out looking after dark. Beth and Daryl were probably holed up somewhere for the night, following the rules, and were perfectly fine.

"It's Beth, isn't it?"

Rick hadn't realized Carl had come to his cell and was watching him from the corridor.

"What?"

"The new woman you're dating. It's Beth, isn't it?"

Carl's voice was as unreadable as his face. Rick seriously considered lying but he knew that would cause more harm than good.

"How did you figure it out?" Rick asked, confirming Carl's suspicions.

"It explains Maggie and Glenn being weird with you for so long. You hang around with her more than usual. I put it together."

Rick patted the bed next to him but Carl decided to remain in the doorway.

"How do you feel about it?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. She's not much older than me."

"That's true."

"Am I supposed to call her Mom and let her boss me around?"

Rick smiled at that. "No. You don't have to do that. You don't even have to like it but someday you'll have to accept it."

"I accept it. I just don't really like it."

"I understand that. I can't say I blame you."

They stared at one another for a few moments. Rick was relieved to have it out in the open, to have this talk with his son, even if it led down a path he wouldn't like.

"Do you love her?"

"Yes," Rick said. "I still love Lori, too. I haven't forgotten her, Carl. I'll never forget her."

Carl's shoulders seemed to sag. His body seemed to deflate as though he was relieved. He'd obviously had doubts.

"Hershel said something like that."

"You talked to Hershel?"

"Yeah. He wouldn't tell me who it was but he said you'd always love Mom."

"He's right. I always will."

"Just do me a favor? Don't be all kissy and touchy with her in front of me. Not for awhile."

"I can do that," Rick agreed with a nod. "I love you too, son. More than Beth, more than Lori, more than anyone except Judith. I love you both the same. There's nobody I'd ever put before you."

Carl nodded, looking a little less burdened. "She'll be back tomorrow. I know it. Daryl won't let anything happen to her."

He left then, leaving Rick alone with his thoughts and his fears. He lay on the bunk and after a long time hoping to hear they'd returned he drifted into sleep filled with nightmares. He finally had something good. How long until Fate ripped it all away from him?

…

_**Rick awoke to Beth's hands gently**_ rubbing his back. He pulled her close, filled with relief so intense he could have wept from it.

"What happened?"

"We got pinned down by a group of walkers. WE ended up spending the night in an old house until they forgot about us and wandered off. We got what Daddy needed but I lost my machete in the fight."

She looked genuinely upset about the machete. She'd been stranded away from home overnight and her biggest complaint had been to lose her weapon. He wanted to insist she never go on a run again but he wouldn't dare. She needed the experience should she ever find herself out on her own trying to survive.

"I'm glad you're home safe. Look, I have something to tell you."

"Carl?" she asked, nodding. He knows about us. He and I already talked. He made sure I knew I wasn't replacing Lori. He's trying to be okay with it but I don't think he is. Not really. Not yet."

Rick nodded his agreement. Just because Carl hadn't thrown a fit didn't mean he was cool with his father dating a girl not even old enough to be his mother, and a girl he'd once had a crush on himself.

"We'll have to be patient and give him time. He'll come around."

Beth put her hand on his thigh and squeezed. He knew what she had in mind and he was thinking along the same lines. "Let's sneak off to the library before everybody gets up and gets going. I need you."

"Let's go," he said, getting up to follow after her.

"Just one thing," she said, as they all but ran toward the library, their bodies aching with the desire to join together. "If you ever come across a walker with a red machete stuck through its shoulder, it's mine."

Rick grinned. "I'll get it and bring it right back to you. I promise."

…

_**Rick had no idea that when**_ he and Beth made love in the library it would be their last time.

One tragedy after another struck within the space of just a few days that kept them too busy to make time for intimacy. Beth's would-be suitor, Zach, was killed on a run. Twelve people died in a walker attack from a good boy who'd died and turned from a sickness. Two more of their people had been murdered in cold blood in Carol's futile attempt to stop the sickness from spreading. Their people went on a medicine run that Rick was afraid they'd never return from. He banished Carol and came home to almost lose the prison to a walker herd.

Now, rick was picking himself up off the ground, wondering where his children were, where Beth was. Hershel was dead. The prison had fallen. His people needed him.

Beth needed him.

Rick faced it all, feeling his heart break once again. His home was gone, taken over by the dead. His daughter was dead, consumed by walkers as her mother had been. He was barely on his feet. Beth was nowhere in sight. Fate had apparently been affronted by his audacity to dare seek happiness, to want too much from this hell they called life, and had once again used a firm hand to put him in his place.

So Rick fled with his son, wondering if he could survive his own wounds. His only advice, the only thing he had to give his son as he limped along, his body weak and hurting, was not to look back. Just don't look back.

…

_**They were on the way to**_ Terminus when he saw it. They'd had to detour, looking for food, and that was when it stumbled across his, Carl's, and Michonne's path. A walker with a machete stuck in its shoulder. Rick could hear Beth's voice just as plain as day when she'd told him that if he saw such a thing, it was hers.

"That's Beth's machete," Rick said.

"How do you know?" asked Carl.

"She lost it on that run with Daryl. She said if I saw it, it belonged to her."

Neither Michonne nor Carl attempted to stop Rick as he moved in on the walker. He yanked the machete out of its shoulder and then used it to finish the kill Beth had started.

"Thanks for bringing it back," he whispered, cleaning the blade on the dead things jeans, feeling a little crazy.

Holding the machete, seeing the B.G. carved into the handle in Beth's writing, made him feel as though he was touching her again. He felt close to her for the first time in weeks. He stood there, holding it, hoping to God he found her alive and well.

Hope, after all, was all any of them had left.


End file.
